Another thing that I realized again: PEOPLE LIE<<<. All the time. No matter what. And most of the time you will even never know a reason of their lies.That's why all you can do is just to get used to that and try not to get stressed out about it.
I mean, it's fine if a person, who you don't care about, lies to you, but if someone, who you actually care about a lot, lies to you, it feels awful. It really hurts.
I'm lost again. I do not know who is my friend, who is not. Why do people, who I actually care about, just forget about me so easily?
Another thing is that I couldn't imagine before that staying in touch can be so complicated, especially if you're the only one, who makes an effort to keep in touch. When I was in the US, it wasn't that hard. It wasn't hard at all. I just skyped people from time to time, I didn't even have a need to talk to them all the time. It's so different now though. I do wanna talk, I try hard to find time, but people just forget about me. Or not. Or maybe they're too busy too. I don't know.
I've also noticed that if you demand something from your friend, it becomes hard to be friends, cuz you get jealous and stuff, and you're just being weird about s***** things. I like easy friendship: when you don't demand anything and a person doesn't demand anything either. However, I usually don't care about that person that much..
So, I gotta set new goals:
- forget everyone, who doesn't care about me. And I'm not gonna make any first steps till December in order to see, who actually needs me.(It is only about people, who I am not sure about anymore).
- stop being jealous about things!!!!
- NEVER gossip.
And here you go - some pics of my last photoshoots:
P.S. Should I stop trusting people??? I feel likeI should trust people only after they prove me with their actions that they deserve to be believed. I know it sound harsh, but maybe it's a right plan for the life. I don't know. Wanna talk about it with someone, who actually earned my trust. Don't think that I'm haughty and arrogant, I was just mistaken in too many people.